It is December and Christmas is officially here! Get your Christmas trees up, start thinking of those Christmas presents and get ready for the absolute feast of football coming your way. December is the month with the most league fixtures in the entire season and can make or break a team's season. Will Manchester City continue their dominance during a packed schedule or will Manchester United close the gap?
All this remains to be seen, but here at Sportsman HQ we have been racking our brains and come up with our own football team made up of players and Christmas puns. Clearly, we are lining up in a reliable 4-4-2 system although the classic Christmas tree formation will be used as a back-up if our original gameplan does not work.
We've even cobbled together an owner, coaching staff and a stadium!
(Warning - These 'puns' may cause excessive cringing.)
Stadium
Tinsel Bank
Owner of the club
David Gold
Manager
Brussels Slade
Assistant Manager
Alan Pardew in a pear tree
Goalkeeper
Darren Rudolph
Right-back
Pascal Chimneybonda
Centre-back
Silent Zat Knight
Centre-back
Ledley Three Kings
Left-back
Fabian Elf
Right midfield
Carrolls Poborsky
Centre midfield
Danny Myrrhphy
Centre midfield
Frankincense Lampard
Left midfield
Ryan Pigs-in-blankets
Striker
Nile Manger
Striker
Cinnamon Pongolle
Substitutes
GK - David Stockingdale
CB - Marcus Ro-ho-ho-ho
CM - Mark Tinsella
CM - Nortei Nortey List
LM - Wayne Sproutledge
ST - Demba Ba-Humbug
ST - Harry Candy Kane
Remember to send in your best suggestions to us on Twitter @TheSportsman and let us know who would make your side!
